around the frame apr 2011 – our experiences

Dear Frances,
 Recently you were trying some new e-mail procedure and wrote, “Being a beginner feels ugly.”  Let me share an opposite opinion.
 Being a beginner is lovely, I am allowed mistakes and missteps with impunity and I always discover a nugget of knowledge to use somewhere else.
  Love you,
Devora (Mar.’11) says, “Enjoy a new virginity.”

Dear Frances,
 Hello! You asked if I’d had legal advice. I did see a lawyer. He advised, “Just leave.”  He said we aren’t really married and I don’t have any responsibility for the house except for half a remodeling loan which I co-signed.
 It’s hard to know I would be responsible for my husband, daughter and son-in-law losing their place to live. (They lost their own house and have poor credit. That’s why they live in our basement.) My family members are just not responsible people!  I feel stuck.
I had to take some vacation time. No fun. I was worried about being alone with my husband — and so was my dad. I didn’t say or do the things I wanted to. I didn’t stand up for myself. I could use some courage.
 Dad’s in a lot of pain with his knee. He has had tests and more tests. We are trying to de-cide whether to trust what his doc says and — if not — what else to do.
I do believe God has a plan for all of us.  I just don’t know what it is.
 Thanks again for listening.
 Love and Prayers,
LindaSue(Mar.’11) adds, “God bless us all!”
Dear Frances,
I haven’t written much to anyone.  (I’m not one to share my pain with others as you may remember.)  I have been dealing with some depression (brought on by trying to wean myself from antidepressant I could no longer afford and, with my pharmacist’s help, finding a cheap generic that works.) I have joined an “ecumenical prayer shawl ministry” (My hometown is BIG on this), and am back to knitting.  I had stopped and only took it up again about two years ago.  As a result of my renewed knitting, the arthritis in my fingers is almost gone!    Allelulia!
 JW/Joy (Nov.’10) adds, “I pretty much still go silent when I am depressed.”

Dear Frances,
 In his last blood test, Uncle Jerry’s cancer indicator was a bit too high.  He had to go for a Pet scan.  Seems his colon cancer has returned and is going toward his liver.
I took a family leave of absence from work to care for him. I feel sad that I am not able to teach but leaving Uncle Jerry alone is irresponsible.  It does not set well with my conscience.
Wish me strength and that Uncle Jerry will regain his total health.
All the best!
(Uncle Jerry says hello.)

Lotte (Mar.’11) adds, “We are still planning to move to North Carolina.”
Dear Frances
You say you “feel” your life changing. My life is changing, too.  I lament for my youth. Last night I had another dream that I was back living at the Three Arts Club as a music student with my whole life ahead of me.  I was speaking with two “old” people (about my age) and in the dream I said to myself, “Boy, it’ll be awful being that old.  I don’t want to end up like THEM.” 
It was weird, but I awoke, feeling cleansed somehow.  All dreams are purging, even if they are strange.  Well, I DO have the rest of my life ahead, it’s just an older one now.  Hee… hee… hee.
Maybe that’s what the dream was trying to tell me.  I can still have goals, they’ll just be different.

BarbaraJean (Mar.’11) adds, “Love the Ninepatch writing.”
Dear Frances,
Earlier, I tried to open the new e-format of Mar. ‘11 Ninepatch you sent, but got frustrated and went on to other things. Today I found your “old format” in my e-mail.  I can open it and I will be able to spend time later this evening reading Ninepatch, which is fun for me.
Funny how you mention feeling isolated from your old friends who live far away.  I feel the same way and I was thinking how much I miss the girl meetings that we used to go to. Those sessions changed my life for the better.  
I get isolated living in the country.  It’s my own fault, I know that.  Yet, I am not a particularly social creature.  I think that the damage from my family of origin made me hyper-vigilant with regard to developing relationships. Then again, it just may be the way I am.  I do miss the company of other women at times, though.   I value your friendship, such as it is, through e-mail and occasional face-to-face meetings when you are visiting here.    I’m comfortable with my husband, yet he can’t do it all for me.
It looks like we may strike a deal with our horse trainer to trade Katie on a younger horse closer to Shaman’s age.  The trainer offered Bill some money for Katie the other day. He didn’t accept it, but began thinking about a trade since Katie is fourteen and Shaman  is only four.  
It’d be nice to have horses of more the same age.  The trainer will let us know what is available.  She has a contact with beaucoup horses available.  
 Happy day to you! Good to hear from you again.

Linda Rosenthal (Mar.11) adds, “We’ll get to see some horse pictures and make decisions in the coming weeks.”

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